I stumble through old love notes that I read through tired eyes
The ferry lights are usually dim, but this morning they're aggressively bright
Now I'm forced to surrender
to this 14 hour day
And I dread the awkward messages that are bound to come my way
And my legs are like jello
I'm gonna need them for my travels
I'm regretting everything I did last night
Why wouldn't things go badly? Why would this time be any different? Why would I ever expect things to turn out right?
I swing and I miss and I follow through
until I end up hitting myself and it leaves a bruise
I would leave everything up to chance
But I've been no better off when these things have been out of my hands
Now I'm down for the count for a month at least
I'll take the time to make some peace in my mind 'til I find a brand new way to fuck things up
I don't know if it's better
or worse for me to come to remember and let myself be haunted
Should I ever let my guard down again?
-
This is my great, big, overdramatic display
of consistently choosing the worst possible way
and I can't see if there's even a lesson to learn
when I end up in the same place no matter which way I turn
-
My little sister wants to know why I don't have a valentine
There are kids in her class who are already uncles and aunts
She's too young to understand all the crazy complications
My mind and my heart couldn't be further apart
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